BREAKING: Brook Lopez ‘too lazy’ to get a playoff haircut

Next to seeing Mariah Carey in concert, getting a haircut is the best spiritual experience you can pay for. What other safe spaces exist to physically and metaphorically rejuvenate you to a fresher, sharper self? Being that this was Brook Lopez’s first career playoff game, I was little surprised he came out wearing his characteristically scruffy mini-afro rather than the sleeker fade he’d shown during All-Star weekend, since there’s no better time to showcase the dedicated you than a hyped up playoff blowout.

At the Nets practice after the game, I asked if he’d considered getting a playoff ‘do. “No, I didn’t. I’m too lazy, honestly,” he said. “I’m just focused on the game.” (Then he laughed, in obvious appreciation of my intrepid reportage.) There’s always the second round!